Day-26, Lockdown

‘Feeling guilty is an emotion any good hearted person will feel’

I don’t know if I agree, because the people who commit a crime, of course feel a twinge of guilt, guilt is kind of a defining quality. So maybe that means, that everyone is a good hearted person, even if its somewhere deep beneath.

I am one who feels guilty in almost everything. Some of my friends tell me that I say sorry at least twenty times a day. What is wrong with that? I honestly don’t know, apparently if you apologise for something that you haven’t done, the apology becomes toxic, spoiling the person whose fault it really was, that’s what my best friend tells me.

Now that makes sense, and I ask myself if I should apologise for apologising, I know that sound weird, but that is exactly how my brain works. But I don’t want to change that in me, because this little thing makes me who I am.

Today I was wondering about guilt, does everyone feel the same amount of guilty as I feel? No, that isn’t normal, maybe everyone knows when it really is their fault, and so they apologise and move on with their loves. They’re not like me, apologising and then bearing with that guilt for the rest of my lives, and always apologising to that person.

Day-25, Lockdown

‘Memories we hold close, teach us to let go’

Memories are a thing we hold dear, those that we cherish and some that fill us with sadness. Memories aren’t just some stuff we remember, they are a part of us. Memories both old and new do teach us to let go, how? 

Well, when we remember the fun times we shared with our old best friend, who now lives in another city, we feel sad… almost empty. When we are reminded of this void, a sensible person’s brain will tell them, you have wonderful reminiscences of you and your friend, and that should not hurt you, in fact you should keep these memories, and move on.

Whenever you are feeling low, these recollections will help cheer you up. Your friend will be with you along the path, at least in your memories. This is how a small quote can make such difference, and mean so many things. 

These memories are lovely souvenirs of time, souvenirs we have brought after a journey or an adventure. Those that will be stuck in your head like a magnet for a long time.

This lockdown is a journey, and I shall surely remember every moment, and emotion. I am not so sure if I will cherish these moments, not all at least. But I will remember how we got through, celebrated each other’s birthdays, and all the fun we had.                                                                             

 Today was a short and somehow enjoyable day,  there was nothing so special about the day though. Just like everyday, but it still ended quickly and more happily.

There is something curious about a day, that was just like any another. But, it had an air of an enjoyable feeling. I hope everyday is so full of life and emotion.

Day-24, Lockdown

Patience

Standing up again,
And walking down that road,
A revolutionary path,
Unbeatable mode.
She turned around,
And saw the storm coming close,
She saw the black clouds,
And the wilting rose.
She finally stopped running,
She was no longer afraid,
The sound of thunder getting closer,
She was determined to feel the rain.
She looked around,
everything still looked beautiful,
That pattering sound,
It was unforgettable.
As the first raindrop hit her face,
Mother Earth she could taste,
She was in no haste.
She was going to sit and wait,
For the rainbow to come.
The raindrops didn’t hurt her,
Instead she was welcomed,
They wanted to alert her,
And tell her that patience was key,
There is more beauty,
Left to see.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                   
                                 

Day-23, Lockdown

‘The more we expect, the less we get’

To me this quote makes a whole lot of sense. Expectations, this word has been hovering inside my head today. When someone says that they hold expectations from us, they expect us to be better at something. This sentence always puts a sense of fear in the listener’s mind.

When we meet someone new, we expect them to behave in some way, talk in some manner and if the person does not live up to our expectations we judge him.

Most people are judgemental, but very less are ready to admit the fact. This mentality of summing up a person on his first visit, has given birth  to a phrase saying, ‘the first impression is the last impression.’ 

It makes a lot more sense, when you’ve experienced it, when you walk into a room and do something wrong and the people who have seen you for the first time, have already summed you up, determined your type, they think they know for sure that you are up to no good. This is the best definition of being judgemental, this definition rings true to anyone who has experienced this disparaging behaviour.

I am one to have great expectations, but not with myself. I have great expectations of my day, of any place I go to, and almost any situation I am in. And if I say so myself, I can be quite judgemental, but never do I judge people on their first impression. This  critical nature of humans is scathing and hurtful. All humans are flawed, but this is the biggest blemish of mankind.

When a person is judged on the first time of their meeting, this can ruin all kinds of relationships , and this is a drawback of fault – finding behaviour. Most of us know that pointing wrongs, hurts other people’s feelings, most have even experienced this.

This is what I had been thinking of the entire day, there is nothing wrong in expecting something, but if those expectations aren’t fulfilled, well then there’s nothing we can do!

Day-22, Lockdown

‘Your nose pointed up, can bring you down.’

Today, I was thinking of the word ‘pride’. Such a powerful word, but it is in such contrast in different situations, sometimes pride is a good thing, while in others it means a person is too high and mighty, portraying that person in a bad way. This word has always confused me.

During times of success, people beam with pride, but sometimes too much pride can hurt. This is what I’ve learnt after reading so many instances of pride. I have come across many people who are filled with unhealthy amounts of pride, and sometimes for no reason at all. Now,  bragging and pride go hand in hand, one brags about one’s possessions if he is proud of them. I have always tried not to be proud, to be down to earth, to be humble. But at times, this has not gone well, in fact it has made me put myself down.

I have learnt that a little pride is good, it cannot harm you. If you are proud then, you should also learn to be humble about it. No pride, results in under confidence. I am constantly reminded that I have lots of things to be proud of, But I have seen people who have been crushed due to their own pride, I have even read such examples in books.

I now know that dignity and self esteem, mean the same thing. So, if you are not proud, you do not have self esteem. Then what is wrong with too much pride? If a person is conceited about his own image, his behaviour changes rapidly. Then there remains no reason for him to have a self image, as he has already fallen low. His own image has fallen low, at least for others if not for himself.

If a person is too proud, it becomes his characteristic, he is defined by his proud behaviour, and that is truly sad.

I still am very afraid to be proud of myself, because I’m too scared about what will happen if I become too haughty and self absorbed. People will start talking behind my back, and as I said before I will have no self image of my own. So, you should learn from me, always be proud of your own possessions, in a considerable amount, remember to be humble about it. Or, you will not respect yourself like me, and this small silly thing will become a dreadful habit.

I learnt a valuable lesson today, conceitedness, and less pride both make a person lose their self esteem and image.

Day-21, Lockdown

We all are well aware of the fact that today, was the day the lockdown was supposed to be ended, but most of us knew what was going to happen.
So, I wrote a poem to summarise what I wrote and how I felt in the past 21 days.

I laughed and I cried,
At times I even sighed,
I decided to give up,
Millions of thoughts,
Running through my mind.
I talked about confidence,
 It was an emotional ride.
I had so many dilemmas,
I was running out of time,
As the days got longer,
I felt more helpless,
I didn’t feel stronger,
But that’s my weakness.
Putting yourself down,
Isn’t the only choice.
I learnt more about my family,
How every situation,
We fought with poise.

Day-20, Lockdown

‘The key to enjoying something is, to fully immerse yourself in it.’

Today was my mother’s birthday, and as I have stated earlier, I was very excited. Everyday, I have to wake up early to attend my online webinar’s, and I didn’t have one today so I decided that I’ll sleep till noon, but the sad part is that, I woke up at ten in the morning. And, when I tried to sleep,I couldn’t. 

So I took a bath, and went to wish my mom happy birthday, I had been making this beautiful card for her birthday, so I gave it to her. When she finished reading it, her face broke off into a smile, and she hugged me.

Then, we cut her cake. It was chocolate flavoured, and it tasted delicious. Lunch was also a fancy affair, the food was so good to taste. My mom was also so happy, she was greeted by so many people. Her phone would ring in every two minutes. She was relaxed, and all those birthday wishes had definitely made her day.

Today was definitely, a change in pace. And everyone felt happy and carefree, for the first time in months.

Also, today at around five thirty, I attended a online workshop on poem writing, I loved attending it. It was so interesting, and I learnt so many new things, the workshop being interactive was even more fun. Today was a wonderful day for me, I learnt something new, I laughed with my family, and saw my mom enjoying herself, a beautiful day all to herself.

I even did something productive. In fact, I liked doing such courses, and so I signed up for a course on creative writing everyday for 12 days. I am so excited, I’m finally doing something productive, few hours of screen time removed.

During this lockdown, people should pursue their talents, and learn something new.   

Day 19, Lockdown

‘Waiting eagerly for something, makes the wait even more longer.’

I had been waiting for the lockdown to end for a long time, though I knew that it would be extended, I didn’t want to be too sure, but alas today the news was broken to me delicately. At first I thought that the news was fake, but after seeing the proof I realised this was true. 

I was shattered, some part of me knew this day was coming but I didn’t want to face it. I was so sad, I silently told myself to stop dreaming about the day the lockdown will end, I had big plans of going outside and meeting myself. This situation has really gotten out of hand.

I haven’t even stepped out of the house, like literally not even the passage of our apartment, I haven’t even walked up to the elevator.

Isn’t it weird, this little things we never payed attention, and now we are missing them. Is it weird such a little thing like riding up and down in the elevator, and pressing the elevator button. I have never missed something so minor, this lockdown is giving us the opportunity to sit down and reflect, opportunities to finally notice the little important things in life that mean so much to us, but not otherwise.

Nineteen more days, I still cant believe it. All those plans, that long mental list, that huge party, those friends, I can’t say that these plans are going down the drain, but they’re delayed…

Day-18, Lockdown

‘Every single brilliant idea we procrastinate is one step away from great things’

Procrastinating is a habit, an addictive one. I procrastinate all the time, but I ain’t proud of it. Recently I have procrastinated a lot, and my priorities have shifted. I have given more time to anything other than study. I do feel guilty at times, but still I don’t open my books and when I do, I don’t concentrate.

 This little thought scares me, I have been reminded time and again that I should be serious about ninth grade. But this lockdown has changed me, it has dulled out the flame of excitement in me, I am no more interested in doing the things that excited me earlier, now all I need is some peace and quiet. 

My top priority is getting through the day, and being happy isn’t even on my list! My parents have tried everything, but the only thing that will make me happy is seeing my friends playing with them just like the old times.

I am trying to find an upside to this lockdown, but honestly I am failing. Procrastinating is harmful, delaying an important piece of work, and then never doing it at all, I have done that many times and it does not male you look good. 

I avoid procrastinating but, when you are sitting at home, you can’t go down to play, most people would resort to video games and Netflix. I am unfortunately like most people in this contest, this is like my pet peeve. When I have work to do, but I am certainly in no mood to do it, I procrastinate and play video games, binge on Netflix.

But this flaw in me, does not change the way people should see me, my good points remain, but so do my flaws.

Procrastinating and laziness go hand in hand, and during these lockdown days they have joined hands with me 🙂

I am trying my best to fight being lazy, and so should you. Stay safe, stay active.  

Day-17, Lockdown

Today is the 17th day of lockdown, it has been 17 days since the news was announced, and I really really want to say that it feels like yesterday, but it doesn’t. It feels like years, since the first day. The other day my mother said, that everyday was passing very quickly. I looked at her jokingly, but she was genuine.

Remember, in lockdown day 12 I wrote about how time flies, well it does. But, not all times. It flies, when you are enjoying something I enjoyed the school year, and saw it flew past. But, I ain’t enjoying this lockdown. I was thinking of writing about some other spiritual stuff I thought of today, but then I wondered what if I wrote about something else, something other than the usual ‘more than my age’ thinking?

So the past few days, I’ve been writing like a normal thirteen year old do, I want to show my readers, my other side the one which thinks about the world innocently and learns and understands like any normal kid.

My mom’s birthday is coming in a couple of days, and I was a bit sad that we won’t be able to celebrate it like every year.

But, my dad lifted my spirits by convincing me that we would give her a birthday she won’t forget, though we haven’t thought of anything yet. I am sure we will make it memorable, not letting even a twinge of regret get in the way.

Today, I studied for a couple of hours in the morning, then I had nothing to do. My routine has been the same since so many days. I wake up, I study, I eat lunch, then the entire afternoon is full of screen time, during evening I talk to my friends, then dinner, and the day ends.

There has been no change, and continuity makes my day even more boring, waking up in the morning and knowing that the things I am going to do today are the same things I am gonna do tomorrow. And, no matter how are I try I just can’t seem to shake it up a bit. Maybe, that’s why I am so excited for my mom’s birthday. A day full of excitement and joy. 

See that is why  I’m writing again, I can tolerate everything that’s going on, because of this blog. All these days, as long as I am telling my readers my feelings and what I am thinking about, I am remaining sane. This blog is like that final thread, the final thread that I am hanging on and depending on. 

Day-16, Lockdown

‘Dilemmas are good for health, they encourage a person to think’

Today I kept thinking about this word, dilemma. It means confusion, the trouble to decide between two or more choices. Simple dilemmas like this takes up most of our lives, and we don’t mind them much. It’s the bigger problems of life that matter more to us.

When these choices get harder, thats where our problems start. When a person overthinks, his friends tell him, to look at the bigger picture and to not worry about these little things. I am one of those people, not the ones who tell you not to worry but the ones who worry about everything.

Tensions take up more than fifty percent of my brain. And when something abrupt happens my world which was non worrisome for a little while, shatters like thin glass, and my head spins. I don’t deal with such situations rationally, I do the first thing that comes to my mind. Even if it doesn’t make sense, sometimes everything works out, and other times everything turns upside down, and I end up making things worse.

Sometimes I say things I never mean to, I alter myself for the likes of the situation, at least that’s what I think I am doing. Now, when I look back at those times I laugh at my own foolishness.

My main dilemmas are, how to react and how to get out of a sticky situation. Should I speak my mind? Should I keep quiet? Should I just change my emotions? Yup, lets do that. 

Photo by Life Of Pix on Pexels.com

Why am I telling you this? Because the lockdown is such a situation, something abrupt has happened, and I don’t know what to do the first thing that comes to me is writing a blog one of the best decisions I have made. And it is because of the people who read this, they convince me that I did the right thing not backing out of this, and inspire me to keep writing everyday. 

Day-15, Lockdown

‘Questions that aren’t answered, are like caged birds’

Today I used this quote, because it kind of jumped at me. Why are those questions like caged birds? Every question has an answer. Yet, the unanswered question has been called a caged bird, because the key, exists, but the bird can’t reach it. That bird will remain in its cage, until somebody frees it. Just a little thought I wanted to share.

Today, was like everyday, the same routine. But, today I realised that I was going nowhere, it felt like I wasn’t doing anything productive. This first thought choked me, and I suddenly felt suffocated. It felt as if the air I was breathing was acidic, I couldn’t take it anymore, I had to go out and I desperately needed to breathe in fresh air.

‘Fresh air. ’ these two words are only heard nowadays, not experienced, though I have pointed out earlier that this lockdown is benefitting the environment, it certainly doesn’t feel like it. How long can a person stay inside and breathe? I guess, most people can pull of this feat with no problem, but I am not like most people, I can’t stay at home like this, no human contact other than my parents, honestly it is driving me crazy.

The government said that the lockdown is till the fourteenth of April, even if they don’t extend it, how long will it tale to attain normalcy? Both, my mom and dad’s birthday comes in April. I really want to celebrate it, go out for a proper dinner, throw a proper party, celebrate, happy times. I miss these times.

My mom says that this lockdown is breaking people, their souls. I believe her, those who live to travel, those creative artists. They long to live again, to come out of the water.

At times I forget (Or am I trying to forget), why this lockdown has been established, I think of this as punishment for humans. This situation, these saddening times will be remembered, the efforts of the common man to fight this epidemic.

This too shall pass.

Day-14, Lockdown

A Poem
When you just have to let it all out,
Then what they think,
That doesn’t count.
All days don’t have to bright,
Because, when you wipe away your tears,
It give you clear sight.
When you think you’re all alone,
And you forget to look around.
When you’re tired to the bone,
But somehow find strength,
You break through the chains, 
with which you were bound.

Today morning, while I was studying, a wonderful idea for a poem came to my mind, I jumped up and got a pencil and a paper, and wrote this poem. I just had to write it in today’s blog. This poem is about those days, when nothing feels right. When you feel down, and nothing can lift your spirits. 

The line, ‘because, when you wipe away your tears, it give you clear sight.’ Well, I wrote it because, I wanted to show how, when you cry it all out you have no more sadness left. And, now only determination is left, so when you wipe away your tears, it gives you a clear sight of what’s ahead.

The line, ‘when you think you’re all alone, and you forget to look around’ shows that, when you feel miserable and sad, you think that you’re facing your troubles all alone. Though, your loved ones are supportive and caring. You forget about them, and focus on your own problems.

This curious poem of mine, has unlocked many doors of thought in my mind today, and now I am seeing this poem in a very different light, when compared to the light hearted and casual attitude I thought of it with.

I was under the notion that this poem was supporting the thoughts of being under lockdown, and I wrote it with the same thought. But now this poem puts light on so many different problems.

I really hope you like this poem, and its short explanation.

Day-13, Lockdown

“The ability to find the light in the darkness makes a person bright”.

Today at nine o’ clock at night. Thousands and thousands of Indians came out on their balcony and terraces to light candles. Thousands showed their appreciation, and this gesture lit up the sky, both literally and figuratively.

I saw everywhere how the dark night sky looked beautiful, as people lit their diyas and lanterns.everyone was cheerful and happy. My familiar surroundings felt different, and energetic. There was cheer and joy. All the people had been cooped up inside their houses for a long times and a simple change in routine, a change in surroundings really lifted up their spirits. For ten whole minutes you could hear cheer outside and happy voices. Everyone took part in this, it felt to me a sign of unity, people whispering with hope to themselves, as they lit their diyas ‘let there be light’.

Though some people made some poor choices, they went out of their houses and burst crackers and folded around. This is going against the norms of social distancing, this movement of lighting diyas was to show our appreciation to selfless service providers in medical and general essential services, and also to unite the Indians, to fight this crisis as one nation. But the people who stepped outside their homes to talk to their friends, and took this movement as an excuse to meet them and to celebrate, burst crackers. I see no reason for celebration in this situation, my only question is, why? Why are people not understanding the seriousness, of this pandemic.

But, other than this rather foolish decision some people have made. Tonight, was magical, you didn’t need firecrackers to light up the sky, the emotions, the energy, the enthusiasm It was all really exciting and new.

My father was talking about we will be able to tell about this lockdown experience to the generations, and the way we all dealt with it will be an exciting story to tell.

Pune city was looking beautiful tonight, and the emotions too, were beautiful. 

Day-12, Lockdown

‘As time flies, a thought we haven’t yet uncovered beneath it all lies’

I had not realised till today, that it had been 12 days! Though I do write the number of days that have passed, I write them unconsciously. I realised today that such a long time has passed since the first day I started writing this blog. And, the readers too have a reason to celebrate, you have been inside your homes for 12 days now. And some people can admit that time flew!

Yes, I realised that this school year also went past, it feels like yesterday that I entered my eight grade class, and sat in one of the benches. I had this nervousness, and I could feel my heart beating with it. A new year, more studies, homework. But the year is now finished, the same year which I thought will be never ending because of all that pressure and burden. In fact, I didn’t even have to write the final exams,and fifty percent of the pressure was in that. I had studied hard, that is why I was a little sad to see it all go in waste. Of course like any normal child, I was also very very happy. Early holidays, I was directly promoted to the ninth grade!

Ninth grade, this feels like a position, of a highly esteemed person. The words ninth and grade put together make a grand name. It feels like I am that esteemed person whimpering under the burden of such a huge title. There you go, I can feel that fluttering heart beat, its wings spread high, but instead of taking of flying, is standing in its place just trembling.

Every year the same words escape from my mom’s mouth she says, “Keya look at you growing up, now ninth grade then tenth grade, then off to college!” Last year she said I was going to eighth grade, and she went on about how the year after that I would be going into the ninth grade. Even from her mouth ‘ninth grade’ sounded so grand, so nice to hear. Yet, a burden.

Imagine how tenth grade would feel then, in my ninths I have too give the pre boards for tenth. Thinking of those scary exams gives me a shiver down the spine. This holiday season, instead of cheery smiles and gola (snow cones)everywhere, there is silence everywhere.

Actually, today was the first day of my online class for ninth grade. So for the entire day I was thinking about how it would feel to step in my new class, advanced studies, the pleasure and ‘excitedness’ of it all. So I thought I should write about all of this, give my minds a little rest, even it will be for a little while.

Day-11, Lockdown

‘Families that spend more time together grow closer’

I know that I have focused on this point before, but not completely. Today, I will talk about how the lockdown has changed the perception towards bonding for many people.

I had thought before that bonding means spending time together, and getting to know each other better. What is wrong with this point of view? Absolutely nothing, yes nothing at all. The definition of such a fun filled activity does not need to be entirely changed, just slightly altered. Don’t you think that the way I defined bonding earlier lacked some humour, some emotion if you will? Let us think back, way back. Let’s think about the time, when no country was under lockdown this definition seemed sensible, right? Well, how about now? Does the definition you had in mind, when the world was Coronavirus free change? I sure hope it does, because if it doesn’t, you aren’t spending the time this lockdown is giving you efficiently.

Before, bonding was a recreational activity, when all family members were free( which wasn’t very common) they thought of sitting down and talking to each other and getting to know each other.

Now, all we have is time! My family and I did not always play board games and card games. In fact, we played them rarely, but now we are all dying of boredom and to give each other company we have started playing all kinds of games.

I am pretty sure many other families are also spending more time with each other, enjoying themselves more.

Yes, it is true that because we are inside our homes, and most children haven’t gone outside for days. Most adults haven’t gone to work places for a very long time. Everyone is getting cranky, and all people have their highs and lows, moms and dads also occasionally get tired of their cribbing children, and cleaning up after them, and sometimes they can’t stand our faces, because honestly, they have had enough! And we understand, I know that sometimes adults take their anger out on their children. (It does get annoying at times.) But I can handle it, I really really want to believe that.

So, all family members who are reading this please learn to tolerate and be happy that you are spending more time with family. Please, don’t take out your anger on us little children (: We may get out of hand sometimes, but this a first time for all of us.

 Also, my changed definition of bonding is…

‘The time you spend with your loved ones, to remind yourself why you loved them is called bonding.’

Keya

Day-10, Lockdown

‘Very few of us are what we seem.’

Agatha Christie

Most of you must have heard of Agatha Christie, the famous author. Her books seem to captivate the reader, we feel as if the scene described by her is actually taking place. Such a wonderful writer, the genre of the books she writes is mostly murder-mystery. I like reading such stories, and in my opinion her writing style is marvellous. Truth be told, the reader doesn’t have a clue who the killer is till we reach the end of the book.

The past couple of days, I started to take an interest in her books again. I was so engrossed in the plot, that I flipped through the pages with great enthusiasm. In fact, I was so enthralled and eager to know what will happen next, that I finished two of her books in two days!

I don’t know why, but when the murderer was revealed I felt a rush inside of me. This wasn’t a usual rush of happiness, but I was actually sad because the book had ended. Seeing that I have no important work to do anyways and practically nowhere to go. I decided to start another one of her books.

Agatha Christie was a wonderful writer, she always has the reader on the edge of their seats. She encourages the readers to use their imagination, and put their detective skills to work, how you may ask? Well, as we read more of the story, the characters reveal and uncover more clues, some creative readers try to put two and two together to see if they themselves can guess who the murderer is. So, to confirm our suspicions, we are vaguely encouraged by the author to read more.

Of course ( and I speak with experience), when the culprit is found in the end, he or she is a person most readers may not have expected to be at all. And this bewildering fact, makes some of us slightly grin. Because, when the person who uncovered the killer, explains how his or her suspicions were confirmed, we retrace our own steps and some like me laugh at our own selves, about how we were so wrong.

Today, Agatha Christie has been on my mind and I thought it would be fair to write about her stories and novels. I recommend her books, as they are good for passing time and keeping you on your feet.

By the way, the two books I have read are, The Body In the Library & Sparkling Cyanide. Tomorrow I  am going to read, ‘And then There Were None

Like most people stuck at home, when you are free, read these books, as they are for all ages and are worth reading…

Day-9, Lockdown

‘Happy April fools!’

That is today’s quote. I haven’t fooled anyone today, mostly because I am not very good at it, and because I haven’t met any of my friends face to face. Usually, every year on April 1, I go to school and in the evening I go down to play. And my friends and I always have a blast, this day gives us a reason to prank each other, and if the person being pranked gets angry, well we have a good excuse. This day gives us a reason to laugh and make fools of ourselves. Though we do it every day, today me and my friends have got a reason for our playful behaviour.

Today was different though, we were all sitting inside in our homes. All of us had wonderful ideas but, we could not use them. Some of us pranked through calls, but it wasn’t the same as when we meet and talk face to face. Though the results of failed pranking were somewhat hilarious I did feel a little sad on not being able to meet any of my friends.

Honestly, I never really thought I’d be saying this, but I miss my friends. All of them, even the ones that irritated me.

Photo by Dennis Magati on Pexels.com

I have many types of friends, the ones who are close to me, the ones who just love joking around, and even those who just hang around me to find mistakes in me. I have some friends who I don’t like being around, mostly because they are always comparing, they always find faults, they have to show off their possessions, these ‘friends’ bring out the worst in me. I believe such friends are called toxic friends. The word describes the friendship, this word defines the friendship.

I am weak towards those who can easily manipulate, I feel I don’t understand human nature at times. These friends are difficult to handle, hard to leave and tiring to be with. The only solution is to speak your mind, but I feel I have no right to advise the reader how to leave such ‘friends’ that would make me a hypocrite, because I too have not taken action.

This is ironic, I started the article by talking about the wonderful time I have with my friends, and I ended up talking about my rocky friendship, and I have given you a glimpse of my ‘bad side’, so to say. I talked about hatred, and not having guts. I am sorry to have ended on a dark note, on a day which is meant to be light and cheerful. But, I was just giving you a ride in my train of thoughts. Thank you for understanding dear readers.

Day-8, Lock-down

Writer’s Block— that’s what I’m experiencing today. Looking at my keyboard for long, I came up with following. Love to share with you all.

Keyboard
Lying there on her bed,
her mind is in an idle state.
Suddenly a wonderful idea clicks in her head.
She jumps off,
And takes her keyboard,
She wipes the dust away,
She hadn’t used it in days.
Her fingers twitch with excitement,
In her mind a picture she tries to paint.
As she clicks the keys,
A story is woven,
With letters like fine thread,
It was just like her mother had said,
It was better than just lying in bed.
The wonderful sound the keyboard made,
It was music to her ears,
It wiped away her tears,
When she was sad,
Other times,
It just made her glad,
To have a friend,
That only extraordinary people have had...

Thank you for your wonderful reviews and comments, definitely helping me to become better in what I’m doing. Stay Safe and Take Care

Day-7, Lockdown

‘Change takes place everywhere, but only a few people welcome it.’

Doesn’t this quote make sense to you? You might have noticed in lots of situations that some people do not like change and try to run away from it. I heard somewhere that ‘change is nature.’ And I have to admit that I agree with the person.

I can give you an example from the situation we are all going through, the lockdown. Suddenly, we see all the shops are closed, and the roads are empty. Most of the population is sitting inside their houses. In India, we are experiencing summer, during this time everyone prefers going out and about. Well, that’s not the case this year. I can say with surety that, we all are adjusting and adapting.

A few days ago I was watching videos of me when I was young, there was this video where I was standing in my balcony enjoying the rain. I noticed that at that time, our building was surrounded by greenery and we could very well see the mountains, that were far away. Today, when I look from the same balcony all I see are buildings, tall buildings. I can no more see the lush green trees, or mountains. I feel sorry to say, that I had forgotten that there was so much greenery around me. This is what you can call change, I have lived in this place for several years, and before I knew it, I was missing something I never noticed was there.

Today the world around us is growing, and you must have observed that there is change in every nook and corner. New things happening every other day, and we have no guarantee in life that every comforting thing around us will always remain the same.

People change, they grow, they forget. Think about it, the people you know and love, have they always been the same?

What I think is that, even knowledge changes a person. The more well-read a person becomes, the more knowledge a person gains, and the more wiser the person becomes.

This was what I was thinking about today, that is why I cannot say that today was a nice and calm day, because there was chaos going on inside my head, those lush green trees kept haunting me I kind of wished to see them again, and what would happen to my society after twenty years. We couldn’t see the moon today. But, the night sky was still beautiful and full of wonder, nowadays due to less pollution we can see more stars in the sky.

I would conclude by saying that change is necessary and we should learn to embrace it.

Day-6, Lockdown

Confidence
“Everyone needs it,
Courage feeds it.
If its there in spirit,
A spark is lit,
To help us see through
The dark corners
of the cave,
To bring the rainbow in the rain.”

Today I thought I should write a poem and share my thoughts on it . Today was a special day, though the weather outside was cool and pleasant, and, at night the moon was looking beautiful, it was dark orange in colour with different shades of red. In the evening, I thought of the above poem and wrote it down on a piece of paper, and a thousand thoughts flooded my mind.

It is true that confidence is needed, without confidence a person is nothing but just flesh and bones. Because with confidence arises personality, and with personality a person can be defined. The line, ‘courage feeds it’ also makes sense to me. It means that when a person has to do a difficult task, he needs courage. When he has courage he is confident enough to move ahead. I thought this lone to be obvious, because of you have courage you are sure to havre confidence.

Now, the next line says, ‘if its there in spirit, a spark is lit.’ In this line I tried to make a little joke, you can take this line both literally and figuratively. Because spirit helps to kindle fires, and in figurative terms, the sentence ‘in spirit’ means that even if confidence isn’t really there in you, and you feel helpless. Even if you imagine that you are a fearless person full of confidence,a spark will light inside you which convinces you. And this method is tried and tested!

Let’s move onto the rest of the poem. In this part of he poem I referred the spark of confidence to a torch or mashaal. Because the torch shows us the way in dark caves, in this poem by the dark caves I meant the problems we face in life, hence the cave being dark.

Now, the last line says,’ to bring the rainbow in the rain.’ Every rain looks even more beautiful after the rain, so when we have both confidence and courage we can achieve making such a phenomenon take place which is rare. Also this last line gives us another aim to get out of the cave, so that we can enjoy the rain and make others joyful by giving them the colourful rainbow.

We have reached the end of the article, I really hope that the poem, as well as the interpretation made sense to you all my readers! See you!

Stay Safe and Confident!

Day-5, Lockdown

‘The first rain always showers joy.’

Today was a wonderful day, because today I experienced the first rain of the year. The past few days there was some drizzling, but you can’t actually call that rain. Rain is when the sky is all grey, and the droplets falling are huge and heavy, and when the first droplet hits someone, that person’s face breaks off into a huge smile. Rain is a phenomenon, which makes little kids run out in the open and yell with happiness, which makes them jump in puddles and splash water on each other. All of this is rain.

Today it rained heavily, and I was standing in my gallery feeling the raindrops on my eyelids. I kept cheering for more rain. I could see that all families were out in their balconies, happily reaching their hands out. It put a smile on my face, from the past one hour we were only hearing loud thunders but not a droplet of rain. And now it was raining so heavily, all we could hear was the pitter – patter of droplets .

As soon as the cold droplets hit my face, a shiver went down my spine. My mom and dad told me to come inside, because they were fearful I would catch cold. But I shouted over all the thunders and the cold rushing wind, “I deserve this!” my parents laughed and they too joined me.

After the rain stops, that wonderful petrichor gives me a strange sense of satisfaction. Petrichor is an earthy smell that you can sense after it rains. I feel that if you haven’t fully enjoyed the rain you don’t deserve that wonderful fragrance. This scent is like a reminder, that it rained.

Rain is like my friend, its there to cheer me up even on my saddest days, when its raining outside I feel so beatific and free spirited, I forget about everything. Even when I am shivering, I refuse to go back inside. I stay outside until the rain stops. I know what you think, I am rain crazy and it is true. It’s like puddles call me whenever I am around them, they call me to jump in them. That is why, I am the most active during rainy reason 🙂

Today was a wonderful experience, the cold wind in my face, the rain drops, the wonderful smell. This article has me wanting to go back in time and enjoy that wonderful rain one more time.

the hope is blossoming! I’m fighting!

Day-4, Lock-Down

‘Ecstasy is an emotion which overpowers all the others’

Don’t you think that this quote makes sense? I most definitely do. Think, when you are excited and ecstatic do you feel any sadness or confusion in your mind? Most people will answer with a ‘no’. I just wanted to share this little thought before telling you about my day.

Today was nothing special, but it was full of different emotions. I was sad, happy and at a point I was ecstatic, for numerous reasons. Nowadays, to kill time I have taken up a new hobby .This hobby is cooking, I sometimes help my mother around the kitchen during lunch and dinner.

Cooking is a lengthy process,but when you make something and have your loved ones taste it and then compliment it, that moment is what most people around the world cook for. So many chefs say that they cook to touch other people’s lives with their food, though I am not a professional cook I get how that feels.

The food cooked with love tastes much better than food which is cooked without any emotions. Yes, food can speak to the one who cherishes it and does not just eat to fill his/ her stomach. When I cook something and give it to my parents to taste, their comments on the food are so full of love that I cherish them. It makes me feel that I am doing something good.

This blog has honestly made me feel hungry, yes this is what I do, I think of food all day. But food apart, yesterday night I was reading all the comments and I broke off into a huge smile. I thought I am doing something that is making other people happy, and this made my, well night.

So many people have appreciated my work, and it touched my heart. So many blessings, so much love, and readers have shown their appreciation a lot, so after reading that yesterday night, I was so happy today, all I did was jump around beaming wide.

Thank you for making my day – Keya

Lockdown Day-3 … Lemons

Today was an ordinary day, where I did nothing out of the blue. Nothing extraordinary. But at night I felt frustrated and tired of living like this. It is just so boring, staying in the house all day and going nowhere, though you do nothing active or athletic it drains all your energy. I felt like crying due to the boredom, and I have never ever cried for this reason, because I have never been this bored! But like the saying,

‘When life gives you lemons, make lemonade’ that is what I am going to do.

I am not literally going to make a lemonade, I am going to look at the good parts of this situation. It is true, I am struggling to find the better halves of the lockdown. But, that does not mean that I am going to give up on this.

When I finished my book yesterday, I tried to find other such books on different websites. I looked everywhere, but I just couldn’t find a book I wanted to read.

Nothing was catching my eye, no story was interesting me.

So I was again sitting idly, staring at a blank wall. This bored me even more, I wailed desperately “I have nothing to do!”

I read everyday on different websites, as the cases grow day by day. My mother says that I should be thankful for staying inside my home, as there is no way that I can catch the virus. But the news of multiple people getting sick and fighting for their lives did not cheer me up.

Though my mom was right, but I just don’t know what to feel anymore, whether to be happy or sad,or excited or bored. From one perspective I can say that I am safe, I am healthy. This is exactly what one half of my brain tells me. But the other half, counts all the cons of staying at home and this half imagines what I would be doing, if I wasn’t under lockdown. This half makes me feel even more alone than ever, I keep reminding myself that all of this is not about me but this is done for my good. I am not the only one sitting at home, and wishing to go outside and breath the fresh air.

In some ways this outbreak also has its own positive outcomes, the healthy people who are ‘stuck’ at home. Are spending more time with their families than they ever have, because lets face it nowadays everyone is busy with their own work and they don’t have time to be with their loved ones. We will never have these many holidays before. Though, we are spending most of our summer holidays cooped up inside our homes but I like spending more time with my mom and dad.

Playing cards, board games, etc. Believe it or not, this virus is also good for the earth’s environment. Yes, when all of India is under lockdown all of the industries are closed, almost no travelling anywhere. This means no use of cars,buses,airplanes,etc. after 21 days the air would feel so clean and fresh. If you look carefully,you will notice that the trees are looking even more green!

So, I conclude by confessing that this article is a way to convince the other half of my brain to shut up!

Day -2 Lock-down

‘Every day is a new day’

I woke up today to the sweet sound of silence. No construction workers shouting at each other,no irritating drilling machine noises or cars honking,nothing. Just pure silence.

My dad entered the room and drew the curtains,so that  sunlight hit my eyes. I stood up as,my mom too entered the room. She was looking glamorous in a saree, today is Gudi padwa! An exclaiming voice inside my head reminded me. Which means I have to wear traditional clothes,my mom reminds me. My reply to this imperative was a desperate no! I don’t like wearing  lehengas and itchy kurtas and pyjamas, especially not during summers. But of course I had to give into her argument,and wear the clothes she had picked out for me.My mom told me to take a bath and get ready,I did as she said.

After  getting dressed I entered the kitchen,and was immediately greeted to the sweet smell of sewai, a Gudi padwa delicacy cooked by my mother every year. The sweet sewai melted in my mouth. After my delicious breakfast we went to the ghar mandir and prayed for blessings which wouldn’t be so hard to send as we were stuck in our home. 

Lunch was a cheerful affair,as we were wearing bright clothes,and everyone was in a good mood. Due to the lockdown,none of the house help have come. And so all the dishes had been piled up from morning. My mom was feeling sleepy and tired, and who could blame her? After all ,she had cooked the lunch and had been doing almost all the chores from the past few days. My dad and I had helped out a bit,but it just wasn’t enough.

As my mom took her afternoon nap, I decided that since I was sitting idle with nothing to do maybe I should help her around the house a bit. So I started to wash all the dishes,and it turned out not to be so boring and I also got a much needed break from screen time. My mother was astonished to find out that all the dishes were clean and set out to dry. She was also relieved,and she thanked me profusely.

I had once read a story of Oscar Wilde, in which the protagonist tells his friend that any creature with a soul always feels warm inside, after helping others. This little chore I did today did bring me warmth. It reminded me that helping others is not a favour, it is a need. This need brings warmth inside of us, giving us the flame we need to keep going.

I started reading at about seven in the evening, and with no breaks (except a much needed dinner break) I completed the book at about thirty minutes past ten. The book was so intriguing, that I was glued to it .I kept turning page after page,and when the book ended I let out a huge sigh of satisfaction.

The joy of completing a book is so fulfilling, it is one of the best feelings. It gives me a rush. Before even opening the book I always have my doubts, but as I turn each page, I always realise that no book is badly written, but every author has a different writing style, that does not match the reader’s way of thinking.

With theses thoughts I sat down to write today’s blog, hoping to give the same feeling of satisfaction to my readers as I feel when I finish a well written book…

Do read my book review, coming next!

Lockdown day-1

All these days, I have not stepped out of my house, and its so depressing. Though, my parents are doing their best to try and cheer me up, by playing board games and card games, but we cant do that all day. So I have spent a most of my day just browsing through various screens(Ipad, T.V., Phone, etc.).And , I know its unhealthy, but I cant find anything else to do. I don’t want to read any books ,I don’t want to study, all I do is just lie on my bed and idle away my time.

Today was no different, but at around fifteen minutes past eight, I heard my father calling me in the living room, he switched on the telly, and flipped from one channel to another, he finally stopped at a news channel, which was odd, because we don’t usually watch the news. I saw the prime minister on the screen, he was talking about coronavirus (isn’t everyone these days.) He said that the government had decided to declare a lockdown, whole India. This news should not have affected the residents of Maharashtra, as we were already on lockdown, (as we have the second most number of cases) but I was devastated, the lockdown extends up till 14th of April, and there is no guarantee that we will be able to come out of our houses even after that date.

I couldn’t think of being cooped up inside my house for another 21 days, the thought alone was horrifying. My parents told me to get creative, and spend my time on more productive things, I agreed. As I remembered we were all in this together, and I was not the only one in this fight. No, the entire population of India was, and that thought was comforting.

Mothers

When we need help,
She wraps her loving arms around us.
She does all our work without making a fuss.
She is always looking out,
And cannot bear to see us pout.
For her that’s her job,
To take care of us ,
And see to it that we never sob.
When I am in her arms,
I forget all my troubles.
She holds me while I sleep,
So I dream only about hope and colourful bubbles.
She works day and night,
For us she can always stand up and fight.
A mother’s love never ends,
And it multiplies because of the love to others she sends.

By- Keya Waghmare

Someone Great To Talk About: Mae Jemison

“I always knew I would go to space”
– Mae. C Jemison

This is the courage that helped Mae to become the first African American woman in space. She is known all around the world for her great achievement. She is a legendary and brave woman, who fearlessly led her first mission in space aboard the space shuttle named ‘Endeavour’. Her mission was called STS-47. When she was a little child she couldn’t decide which occupation she would like to take up when she would grow up. She studied chemical engineering, and was also a physician and NASA astronaut. She also volunteered as a doctor in Cambodia and Sierra Leone. She spent one hundred and ninety hours, thirty minutes and twenty three seconds in space.
Mae’s inspiration to join NASA was an African American actor (Nichelle Nichols)who played lieutenant Uhura on the famous television series, Star Trek.
Mae could speak many different languages like, Russian, Swahili and Japanese. After she came back from space,she realised that her true passion was helping people, improving health and serving the needy of the people inAfrica. So she quit NASA and founded a company which uses satellites to do just that.
All young girls around the world look up to Mae Jemison as an inspiration and as an idol. Her story tell us that it doesn’t matter what our race, gender, colour or caste is, to achieve our dreams we only need willpower.

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