Day-57, Lockdown

It’s 11:15 PM, and I’m posting

So, I have always known that I suck at committing to something or being consistent at something. This lockdown blog of mine has really tested my patience now and then, but I have never stopped moving forward.

Today though, I had nothing to write, no backup topic, nothing. Whatever I wrote I kept deleting it. A part of my brain said that I was overthinking, and I just had to take a deep breath. And I tried, I really did but my mom and dad said that they were running out of oxygen so I stopped. So, obviously that wasn’t working.

So should I just stop writing this blog? To be honest I really really want to, but a part of me, a tiny fragment is just not letting me. No matter how many times I announce that I am gonna stop writing this blog, I always come back to my keyboard. It’s just so strange, and honestly irritating. Maybe its that guilty part of me, the one that won’t let me give up. Or that proud part, the one full of ego and ambition. Because deep down, it feels shameful quitting this. It feels like a project, an experiment really. I tested it out for the first time to see if it would work, and then it became a part of me.

To be honest, I don’t love writing this blog. Every single day I hold my head thinking of something to write. It’s  something I dread doing, but I still do it. It’s like when I’m running a cold and it’s raining outside, and I see all my friends playing, I do it even though I don’t  want to. I don’t know why, but rain always finds its way in my post.

Today was a special case, I just couldn’t find anything to write. Day by day my posts are getting short and I apologise for that. But I am really running out of things to write about. And, when I have nothing to write about I complain. And lower the low self esteem I have. So, fingers crossed for tomorrow’s post…

Published by Keya S. Waghmare

inhale the sweet melodious scent of poetry...

2 thoughts on “Day-57, Lockdown

  1. Your ability to express continues to amaze me. It is possible to impress with your thoughts when you have your own choice of interest to discuss, you always do that. But today you could impress with your sincerity in explaining that there is nothing to express. There are always some period of blankness, believe this is the most fertile period.

  2. A blank mind is better than a mind with negative thoughts. At times, the mind goes blank – no ideas, no inspiration. Who knows, it just might be the calm before the storm! After all life is that blank canvas on which one throws all the paint one can. Reality is created by the mind, we can change our reality by changing our mind. Where you are today is where your mind & will has put you, where you are tomorrow is where your mind will put you. God Bless & keep writing

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: